The Vineyard Entrance

If you’ve read my blog since 2018, you might have seen a verse appear over and over again in my writing.  It’s a verse that has popped up in my life over and over again.  I feel drawn to it.  It feels like a verse meant for me, yet I’ve never truly believed it was for me.  It felt both for me and at the same time something I didn’t deserve.  The verse goes like this:

I will return her vineyards to her and transform the Valley of Trouble into a gateway of hope. She will give herself to me there, as she did long ago when she was young, when I freed her from her captivity in Egypt.

--Hosea 2:15

I always imagined my younger self and the way I freely gave myself to God. But the words “I will return her vineyards…” and  “she will give herself to me there…” are future minded, not present tense.  But before I get too far ahead of myself, let me take you back.

If you’ve read my blogs before you know I struggled for many years with all the things in my brain.  Turns out I was diagnosed with mental illnesses (I’m THRIVING now thanks to a tiny white pill, therapy, and a LOT of Jesus).  If you’ve read blogs (like this one), you know there was one Promise I clung to for many years:

They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest.

--Psalm 126:5-6

I read this as I wept for peace.  Each day I planted my seed and sobbed over it - probably watering it with my tears.  But I knew God promised a harvest.  So faithfully I planted my seed.  And as I did so, God reminded me there was more:

…instead of ashes,

the oil of joy

    instead of mourning,

and a garment of praise

    instead of a spirit of despair.

They will be called oaks of righteousness,

    a planting of the Lord

    for the display of his splendor.

They will rebuild the ancient ruins

    and restore the places long devastated;

they will renew the ruined cities

    that have been devastated for generations.

Strangers will shepherd your flocks;

    foreigners will work your fields and vineyards…

Instead of your shame

    you will receive a double portion,

and instead of disgrace

    you will rejoice in your inheritance.

And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,

    and everlasting joy will be yours…

For as the soil makes the sprout come up

    and a garden causes seeds to grow,

so the Sovereign Lord will make righteousness

    and praise spring up before all nations.

– Isaiah 61:3-5, 7,11 (emphasis mine)

He, again, promises something instead of what I had in my hands then.  And even more, he promises a vineyard and harvest.

So now that you know where we came from.  So His promise of “will return her vineyard” is now “I returned her vineyard to her.”  And here is where I’ve been…standing at the gate of the vineyard.  I haven’t walked in yet.  

But I see it needs attention.  The ground is a little barren.  The vines need pruning. The soil needs nutrients and water.  The gate is a little rusty and splintered.

This is why vineyard is my word for 2022 and this isn’t the last blog about this either.