A Letter to the Girl Opening the Envelope

May 15

As I finish my last final of my undergraduate career, I wrote this letter to myself at 17 opening my college acceptance letter to NJIT in November of 2010. The letter tells myself some secrets, memories, and after thoughts to theoretically ease the "pain" of life events and actions. I dedicate it to every single person that this letter hints at--because of all of you I am who I am today! Thank you, dear friends.

To the girl opening the envelope,

You’re about to open more than an envelope; you are opening a new door, new possibilities, and a new world. What’s inside that envelope is a letter that says “Congratulations” and you are accepted in your dream college with your dream architecture program. Your eyes will fill with tears as you read that letter. What you don’t know is in nine months you will begin a four year journey that will make you into a person better than the one in your dreams.

You will join eight student organizations over those four years. You will fall in love with women’s soccer and Asian culture. You will join a Korean church group that will transform your faith. You will go on retreats with them, worship with them in NJ and in the city. You will go through Basic Discipleship training at Columbia University with them. You will discover there is more to NYC than Time Square and find the secret hideaways to study and to play. You will find the busy streets are peaceful. You will feed the hungry and pray for the people in your train car. You will lug foam core, chipboard, and other bulky art supplies on that train too.

You will study hard. Academics will always be your number 2 (behind God). You will sacrifice friends and family for it, but they will love you anyways. And sometimes they will drive to NJ to cook your Thanksgiving because you haven’t slept in 4 days. Speaking of, you will find out your limits, make yourself sick, and learn the real meaning of stress. Side Note: You can stay up 5 days straight with NO sleep (including naps) with coffee and Rockstars and chips, but you will regret it! But it will all be worth it in the end because that effort will be recognized when a Senior Architect from your favorite firm loves your project.

You will go on adventures. Explore things you’ve never seen before and might never see again. You will fly a few times. Meet people from around the world. But none of it will compare to India, still. You see Hillsong United and Rascal Flatts in concert (two of your favorites.) And you will do the thing you said you wouldn’t do…join a sorority. But don’t worry, those adventures, trips, leadership positions, half of those organizations are all because of that! You will resist them rushing you for a year and a half. But what you discover is their passion for leadership, scholarship, service, and love for each other. You will fall in love with them, especially your new member babies and tree. You will get a little and grandlittle of your dreams. And the person you swore would never be your big, is your big. Also a girl that shadows you as a freshman becomes your pledge sister and roommate.

You will be president of two National organizations, Vice President of Member Development, Senior Class Facilitator, Director of New Member Education, and Director of Ritual of Alpha Sigma Tau-Beta Upsilon, Vice President and Treasurer of your dorm, and hold various other positions in other organizations. You will learn a new instrument and listen to new music, but you will always love country the most. And you will fall in love with sushi! You can use chopsticks with either hand.

You will fall in love, go on dates (some better than others…wayyyy better), and have your first kiss (and hate yourself for it because IT. WAS. SO. AWKWARD.). And you will laugh about those boys and that kiss down the road. You will learn what your mom meant by “don’t eat the fruit.” But you will continuously do it anyways. Also no matter how much fun drinking “Jello” out of a giant mason jar sounds, the night is bound to get bad. Oh and Jack Daniels might be your “friend,” but trust me he isn’t, even if he teaches you to "dance." Speaking of: if you’re going to make an entire box of mashed potatoes and sleep (yes sleep) with the pot in your bed, put up your hair. Also you don’t eat Chinese food WITH chopsticks drunkenly in bed either. Actually, try to keep your 3 am meals out of your bed period because then you will have to do laundry.

You will lose your aunt, but gain another (and a new cousin too). You will have to change to the four year program and sacrifice your architecture license (for now). You will cry about it (and still will). It will make you bitter. But it will make you stronger. You will realize who cares and who doesn’t when it all happens. You will find out who prayers for you too! Actually you will find the true power of prayer and God in your life. You will dive into daily devotions and realize you can’t live without them. Finally.

You will also stay true to those who matter from high school as well. You will hold on to some for too long. Others will come back into your life. And those life-long friends, they stay too! Your friend circle will change in college too, but the most important ones remain (including the blonde girl from your first day of school you thought you “hated”….she’s your big and greatest friend). You will be in weddings, plan events, and “be an adult.” You will become friends with the most unlikely people at school and back home. And the dying question of your life…you become a camp counselor and you love it and the people more than you did as a camper! And the quiet camper in you becomes that weird counselor that dances on stage. I’m not kidding. Oh and you learn to Zumba and you secretly love it.

You will realize that the people you were jealous of in high school don’t matter after all. You become the “Hall Counsel Member of the Year”, you will win scholarships, get leadership certificates from 2 conferences, and represent your organizations in San Antonio, Pittsburgh, and Atlanta. You will win President of the Year, Sorority Woman of the Year, and the Outstanding Student Leader Award. So don't stress losing that presidency last sprint nor being captain of your teams, it really wasn't worth it anyways.

You will have professors, advisors, and mentors that will push you, mold you, and make you better. Your parents will be your best friends. You will call them crying any time of day, any day of the week and they always know what to say. (Hint: when you haven’t slept in 3 days and call your mom crying because your ID is missing and it’s 11pm and you have no food or no way to get to your room or leave the building….it’s in your backpack in that side pocket you never use).

You will learn the power of wine, a pint of ice cream, and a great friend when you have a broken heart or a fight or just want to craft and have fun. I don’t want to ruin the journey too much for you, though. Be patient with yourself and others. You will plant seeds in yourself and others that won't bloom until your last semester. That is okay! So when you open that envelope and see your future remember to stay true to yourself and your faith and you will make it through. Every bump, tear, missed hour of sleep and stressful moment will be worth it because you won’t reach your goals and dreams…YOU WILL EXCEED THEM.